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Today I lost my Mum 19:37 - Dec 31 with 10193 viewsToast_R

The last month has been tough watching her deteriorate while also trying hard to keep her beautiful smile for us.

She was the most dedicated and wonderful mother to me and my older brother. Driving us to Saturday league football in all weather, those winter days where it had been pouring with rain, pitches thick with mud and freezing cold. Mum would be dragging us there in her wellies, armed with a flask of coffee and an old ice cream tub of quartered Oranges for the teams half time refreshments. She’d even collect the weekly subs from the other parents. She wasn’t a football fan but she was a dedicated mum.

Taking me to QPR was just a step too far for her as we lived in Merton and travelling to The Bush was just never possible, especially as my Brother had chosen Wimbledon. My Dad on his Saturday’s off would take us to Plough Lane.

My mum did however come back from a school parents evening one time, excited to tell me she’d met my French teacher who as soon as she’d mentioned my name, confirmed to her “yes Queens Park Rangers supporter” and then chatted to her about QPR being a lifelong fan himself. He generously offered to take me to Loftus Road for a match, if she agreed. Cue March 1993 and my first QPR game, a dazzling 3-1 win over Norwich with Les Ferdinand scoring a classic. I never looked back after that. Thanks Flynnbo!

Today is NYE, it feels like the end of the world right now, my heart is broken without her in my life anymore and I’ve hardly slept the last 48 hours and spent many of those at St George’s hospital with my brother. This morning we collected her things and kissed her goodbye for the last time, she was finally free of her pain. For some reason I feel racked with guilt that I couldn’t do more for her, spent more time with her in my adult years. She loved us and her two grandkids until the end.

Sorry guys, needed to get that off my chest.

Toast_r
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Today I lost my Mum on 14:15 - Jan 1 with 1118 viewsloftus77

Very sad to hear this, Toast, but lovely words from you in your posts. RIP to your Mum and Best Wishes to you and all your family.
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Today I lost my Mum on 17:47 - Jan 1 with 1044 viewsJimthehip

desperately sorry to hear this :(
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Today I lost my Mum on 19:22 - Jan 1 with 1010 viewsthemodfather

Sad news
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Today I lost my Mum on 19:26 - Jan 1 with 995 viewsTommyQPR

RIP

I hope you're as good as can be given the loss of your mother.

Think of the good times and all the fond memories you have of her.

Take care.
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Today I lost my Mum on 20:20 - Jan 1 with 964 viewsGloucs_R

Condolences buddy 😞

Poll: Are we staying up?

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Today I lost my Mum on 21:59 - Jan 1 with 941 viewsCLAREMAN1995

Powerful and emotional post about a beautiful soul gone to the Promised Land and free of suffering God rest her soul.
Try and give yourself a break on the guilt Toast_R you are heartbroken enough on grief alone and the loss of such an incredible person.
Wishing you and your brother strength in the days and weeks ahead .RIP
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Today I lost my Mum on 22:06 - Jan 1 with 936 viewsRsinWales

Lovely tribute mate. You will no doubt cherish those wonderful memories more and more as time passes. All condolences to you and your family.
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Today I lost my Mum on 22:09 - Jan 1 with 930 viewsHunterhoop

Very heartfelt, Toast. Sorry for your loss. I hope the coming months aren’t too painful.
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Today I lost my Mum on 01:48 - Jan 2 with 894 viewsBklynRanger

Really sorry Toast, RIP to a great mum.
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Today I lost my Mum on 08:33 - Jan 2 with 858 viewsjoe90

Hello Toast, I'm sorry about your loss and hope you and you're family are okay - considering the circumstances.

For what it's worth, you've written a beautiful and touching tribute. Guilt is normal and the pain will ease with time and I hope sharing your feelings has helped with that.

Take care mate.
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Today I lost my Mum on 08:42 - Jan 2 with 853 viewskingsburyR

What a lovely tribute to what sounds like a fantastic Mum.

My most sincere condolences to you, your brother and your family Toast.

KR

Dont know why we bother. .... but we do!

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Today I lost my Mum on 10:13 - Jan 2 with 802 viewsrobith

I'm so sorry for your loss Toast, especially on a "landmark" day when people celebrate which must have compounded it.

There are tough days ahead but words I found solace in in time were "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened"
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