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Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday 15:02 - Nov 26 with 8572 viewsdanehoop

On a more positive note I am taking my boy to his first game on Saturday. It is his birthday the day before so will be a part of the special weekend for him.

Going to be a big challenge for him as he is autistic and crowd and noise will quite unnerving (we will be taking along his ear defenders just in case) but he is determined to come and see what makes dad so angry most Saturday afternoons. He already knows that Chelsea are scum and QPR are the best football team ever* and will be wearing his QPR hat and scarf.

Any advice for others who have been down this route recently of what to do keep a ten year old happy at the ground?

* Lets not burst that bubble just yet.
[Post edited 26 Nov 2014 15:12]

Never knowingly understood

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Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 11:50 - Dec 1 with 1987 viewsGloucs_R

Taking my 5 year old to the WBA game for the first time....I think he is more excited about the large hot dogs than the game!

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Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 12:03 - Dec 1 with 1974 viewskensalriser

Well done danehoop, one of the best match reports I've ever seen!

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Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 12:06 - Dec 1 with 1968 viewsLblock

Heart warming.

Just.

Bloody.

Great!

Cherish and enjoy life.... this ain't no dress rehearsal

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Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 12:35 - Dec 1 with 1920 viewsloftboy

Great new Danehoop, great report as well.

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Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 12:56 - Dec 1 with 1886 viewsAgedR

Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 10:22 - Dec 1 by danehoop

Was just looking for the thread to post this up.

My son had a great day, turned it into a big day out with dad. Straight onto big train to Waterloo at 12.50, forced our way through the Jubilee Line/Central Line chaos and wandered up to the ground at 14.15. Son getting quite excited at this point, but a little concerned by the noise. Picked up a programme (more later) and a copy of AKUTRs for dad. Through the turnstiles, met immediately by Spark for a fist bump, picture and then face painted (very pleased with that). Shot into the kids area, then grabbed hotdogs and went to the seats. My sons face when we walked into the stand was a picture, then when he saw a happy 10th birthday message on the score board it was really something special. Noise was already building as the crowd came in so we got his ear defenders on early which I think was the key thing for him to get used to the atmosphere.

Had great seats in Row B or PL block, which were fantastic as the sun set and the lights became apparent on making it a magical stage to watch the game. Jude came bouncing around and fist bumped the kids just before the game started. The Clash London calling was immediately recognised as Dad's ringtone and so something familiar which he identified with. Opening exchanges all looked good and the positive buzz was felt quite OK. Then he was baffled when Leicester scored in 3 minutes wanting to know what had happened and how we seemed to be letting them do it to us (I suspect as a 10 year old school boy he might have recognised the obvious flaws in approach which seem to beyond our defensive coaches).

Then the special moment - the equaliser and the place going nuts. Cue Pigbag and mad dancing, screaming and jumping up and down. This was the point I was worried about, the overload for his autistic sensibilities when the wall of sound and inexplicable behaviour takes place as the outpouring of happiness (and relief) from 17,000 fans hits you. For a second he was surprised, frightened and then realised everyone seemed to be happy and not angry. As soon as the Pigbag music started up and I started dancing him around he was away and loving it. Unsure a little as to what had just happened (we didnt get a great view of the goal - but knowing it was important.

After that the game flew past. He understood the finer use of English going on around him more than I hoped and certainly too much for me to tell his mum. Was a little baffled by chants about Kasper Schmichael and his dad, but took it in good heart. Then picked up on comments from behind us about Niko's inability to play on the wing and not running as much and related that back to me. When we scored a second he knew the form and went delirious with the rest of the crowd.

Half time he saw his name again, but this time on the big screen and then heard his name in the half time PA announcements which got his name spot on. That was a fantastic moment and the one he said afterwards was the best thing on the day for him.

Second half started, eyes down and equaliser for Leicester. Not a happy bunny and started joining with C'mon you R's. Charlie scores, madness descends again all around us and he was completely immersed in it all. I asked if he wanted to leave early so we could avoid the crowds and the rush. "No - I want to stay until the end!" as if suggesting such a thing was the most stupid thing ever. At the end, the whistle went after an eternity and we slowly left the ground.

Just made the train by seconds at Waterloo and managed to sit down and read the programme. Then he spotted his name on the message board at the back as was just made up. I asked him what he enjoyed the the most? "Seeing his name on the big screen, us scoring a goal and booing the other team." Does he want to go again? "Yes after Christmas please."

He is taking his photos and programme in today to tell everyone in his class about his great day out. They are all Chelsea where he goes to school - but none have actually been obviously. He now has become part of something special, and he knows it. He is an R.

A great day. Thank you to everyone who gave advice on here, Dave B and Loftboy in particular, really made it good to give him a narrative on what to expect and in how to approach the planning. Also a big thanks to the club as well who pulled out the stops at short notice on the programme and notice board arrangements.


What a wonderful report Dane.

My 11 year son is autistic and I recognise a lot of your concerns. I've been taking him since he was 7 and he loves the day out. I tend to think he is our lucky charm as his first season was the Adel promotion season and this and the following 4 (hopefully 5) seasons have been some of the more momentous in our history.

He loves the pandemonium when we score and the fact that he is often hugged by complete strangers.

I thought it was a lovely touch to for you to get your son's birthday greeting displayed and read out. This will forever be "his" game.

You will know that autistic kids can often have absolute intellectual clarity. Bearing this in mind, when I ask my son who his favourite player is, he still says Adel...

From a fellow proud Dad of an autistic R

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Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 13:05 - Dec 1 with 1876 viewsHAYESBOY

Fantastic thread this.

Never had kids and was a big regret of mine.
Always wanted to be able to take my kids to a QPR game and try and get them hooked.

Have sort of lived through it with my best mate and his son (my God son) who is now 12 and is a ST holder now for his 7th year.

This is what going to football should be about IMO.

Smells like a trout farm in here

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Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 14:07 - Dec 1 with 1829 viewsstonebridgers

A great post I am glad your lad enjoyed the day. AS a club there are great at doing things in the programme and on the screen for the children. They kindly did it for my daughter when she first went to a game a few years ago. She is nearly 7 now and she has been to a few games with me and loves the atmosphere and the singing especially the Charlie and Bobby songs.
I went to the boxing on Saturday and she said to me that she was very sad as I was going out for the day and not bringing her but then added "At least you are going to the boxing I would have been really really sad if you were going to QPR and not taking me"
My heart melted and I know my job in turning her into a R's fan is working. Now to start on the 2 year old son.

Stonebridgers

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Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 16:51 - Dec 1 with 1750 viewsfrancisbowles

Great stuff Dane and after the 5-2 v Forest last year and this match, if anyone else wants to start a thread about taking their kid for the first time, we can all repeat our messages and hope for another exciting win!
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Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 18:27 - Dec 1 with 1707 viewsterryb

I've only just noticed this thread.

Dane, one of the best match reports I have ever had the honour to read & the posting from Daveb was also superb!

So glad your son (and yourself) had such a great day.

This is one of the most enjoyable threads & fills me with optimism.
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Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 18:43 - Dec 1 with 1695 viewsPunteR

Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 10:29 - Dec 1 by paulparker

Glad you& your lad had a top day Dane , what a great game to go to as your 1st game, hopefully he will remember it when he gets to our age,
BTW I hope you told him its not like that every week


Brilliant post Dane. Glad it went well for you both.

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Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 19:56 - Dec 1 with 1661 viewsdanehoop

Thanks guys. I am very proud of my son, he has taken all that big day out in his stride and seems to have come through it all well. I was really worried how it might all turn out, but he genuinely enjoyed the experience and wants to go again. So I'll be looking at the home fixtures after Xmas, possibly not Man U as that may be a little more, erm, boisterous a fixture, probably the Southampton game next.

That of course all changes and if we go on a bad run I'll try and smuggle him along as a lucky charm.

Never knowingly understood

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Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 20:35 - Dec 1 with 1632 viewswood_hoop

Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 19:56 - Dec 1 by danehoop

Thanks guys. I am very proud of my son, he has taken all that big day out in his stride and seems to have come through it all well. I was really worried how it might all turn out, but he genuinely enjoyed the experience and wants to go again. So I'll be looking at the home fixtures after Xmas, possibly not Man U as that may be a little more, erm, boisterous a fixture, probably the Southampton game next.

That of course all changes and if we go on a bad run I'll try and smuggle him along as a lucky charm.


Thank you danehoop for sharing such a wonderful day with us all, many moons since my kids went to their first game and your report brought those wonderful memories back, I do hope your son does come again, and the day is just as great as his first.
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Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 21:08 - Dec 1 with 1615 viewsGRDHoops

I've read this messageboard for many years but have been very moved reading this particular thread, so much so that it has prompted me to finally join and make my first post!

Firstly, Danehoop - so glad that you and your boy enjoyed your day together on Saturday. I'm glad it went well for you both & that your son enjoyed the match day experience at Loftus Road. QPR has always been a family club and its great that they make children feel welcome & feel happy.

I would very much one day like to take my daughter to see the R's play. She recently turned 4 and, just over a year ago, was diagnosed with Autism. Her autism is quite severe so it may be a liitle while before I can take her to a match but she enjoys watching the games at home & watching MOTD with her Daddy on a Sunday morning!

On a personal level, I (as has my wife) have struggled at times to come to terms to terms with our daughter's diagnosis but we've learned to cope with the challenges that we have faced & ultimately we are privileged to have such a beautiful,happy & loving daughter. Reading the responses from other QPR fans who have children with Autism or other disabilities and the support towards one another is very comforting & makes me feel proud to be a fellow fan of this great club & community of people.
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Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 21:27 - Dec 1 with 1591 viewsTacticalR

Amazing stuff, danehoop.

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Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 21:28 - Dec 1 with 1591 viewsdanehoop

GRD,

glad to see you sign up. I took my eldest boy and he is high functioning on the scale, when his ASD really manifests is when he is anxious and then he goes into total shut down. When he was first diagnosed we were in Denmark and we were lucky that we got an early diagnosis (he was under 3 years old). The downside of being in Denmark was that they generally categorise you as ASD and stream you straight into an institution from that point. Fortunately I was in a well paid job and with a good employer and was able to keep him in mainstream with dedicated TA's and therapy. He made great progress and generally holds his own - though he has physical disability as well, he has defied the original diagnosis and been a very positive little guy. So getting him to QPR was a massive step and one that has been 3 or 4 years in getting to.

His little brother is also autistic, but is moderate to severe on the spectrum and probably nearer 3-4 years old. He is 8 years old and goes to a special school. He isn't yet ready for a day at QPR, but has made good progress since he has been at his school. I do have hopes for him to come along one day. Again though that will take 3 or 4 years to get him in the right place to take on the challenge. He may not be able to stay long or really enjoy the experience, but it is something I may set as a goal for him when he is older. I think he will get there eventually. Being at Loftus Road with both of them would be a special. If we can see you and your daughter there as well, well that would be a beautiful thing.
[Post edited 1 Dec 2014 22:25]

Never knowingly understood

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Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 21:54 - Dec 1 with 1568 viewsdavman

Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 12:03 - Nov 27 by simmo

That thread may have been from me, the boys first game was indeed the Forest win :-) Those last 10 minutes were great, he was up on the seats going crazy for the last 2!

He's not too fussed about going back but it was a great experience to be there with my son, as I was with my dad once upon a time, and so on...


Sorry, simmo, it was me!

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Since that 5-2, Aaron has seen Watford 2-1, Sunderland 1-0, Leicester 3-2 at home at Soton 1-2 away.

We have tickets for WBA and PalARSE, so let the run continue (at home anyway).

He has taken football to another level for me. I thought it was all about the beer (Gripper and Varc will tell you some stories about bouncing down the Goldhawk Road shop fronts after a hospitality experience...) and it still is, but all this being sensible, getting excited when we score and not too disappointed when we concede; you know what, there's something to be said for it...

Any others have said, a heartwarming thread - long may it continue, danehoop - you keep it balanced and I'm sure he'll follow your lead!

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Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 22:30 - Dec 1 with 1544 viewsGRDHoops

Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 21:28 - Dec 1 by danehoop

GRD,

glad to see you sign up. I took my eldest boy and he is high functioning on the scale, when his ASD really manifests is when he is anxious and then he goes into total shut down. When he was first diagnosed we were in Denmark and we were lucky that we got an early diagnosis (he was under 3 years old). The downside of being in Denmark was that they generally categorise you as ASD and stream you straight into an institution from that point. Fortunately I was in a well paid job and with a good employer and was able to keep him in mainstream with dedicated TA's and therapy. He made great progress and generally holds his own - though he has physical disability as well, he has defied the original diagnosis and been a very positive little guy. So getting him to QPR was a massive step and one that has been 3 or 4 years in getting to.

His little brother is also autistic, but is moderate to severe on the spectrum and probably nearer 3-4 years old. He is 8 years old and goes to a special school. He isn't yet ready for a day at QPR, but has made good progress since he has been at his school. I do have hopes for him to come along one day. Again though that will take 3 or 4 years to get him in the right place to take on the challenge. He may not be able to stay long or really enjoy the experience, but it is something I may set as a goal for him when he is older. I think he will get there eventually. Being at Loftus Road with both of them would be a special. If we can see you and your daughter there as well, well that would be a beautiful thing.
[Post edited 1 Dec 2014 22:25]


Dane,

My daughter started pre-school at a Special School in September which has been a fantastically positive experience so far. It is an enviroment that she has thrived in and we are currently going through the process of getting her a place there for primary school next September. She is still currently non verbal and has problems with mobility but we have seen massive improvements already this year, a year ago she couldn't walk at all and now she is toddling around quite happily.

Taking her one day to watch QPR would be an amazing and emotional event. Being a very sensory child, I think it is something she would enjoy, she loves the movement & the goals being scored - glad that QPR have scored some recently! Currently a trip to the shops or a meal out is an operation in itself, some days she can cope well but others days she can get frustrated & upset, as you will probably have experienced yourself with your sons. We take each day as it comes & that is all we can really do for the time being. Hopefully her time for a visit to see the hoops will come one day.
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Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 00:00 - Dec 2 with 1516 viewsBrianMcCarthy

Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 21:08 - Dec 1 by GRDHoops

I've read this messageboard for many years but have been very moved reading this particular thread, so much so that it has prompted me to finally join and make my first post!

Firstly, Danehoop - so glad that you and your boy enjoyed your day together on Saturday. I'm glad it went well for you both & that your son enjoyed the match day experience at Loftus Road. QPR has always been a family club and its great that they make children feel welcome & feel happy.

I would very much one day like to take my daughter to see the R's play. She recently turned 4 and, just over a year ago, was diagnosed with Autism. Her autism is quite severe so it may be a liitle while before I can take her to a match but she enjoys watching the games at home & watching MOTD with her Daddy on a Sunday morning!

On a personal level, I (as has my wife) have struggled at times to come to terms to terms with our daughter's diagnosis but we've learned to cope with the challenges that we have faced & ultimately we are privileged to have such a beautiful,happy & loving daughter. Reading the responses from other QPR fans who have children with Autism or other disabilities and the support towards one another is very comforting & makes me feel proud to be a fellow fan of this great club & community of people.


Welcome to the board, and what an excellent first post!

Best of luck to you and your family.

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Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 01:22 - Dec 2 with 1489 viewsFredManRave

This thread just keeps getting more emotional!

A great read all round, especially the pre and post match posts from DaneHoop. So pleased you both had a great day. And welcome to GRDHoops.

Nothing but admiration and best wishes from me to Dane and GRD.
[Post edited 2 Dec 2014 1:22]

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Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 18:10 - Dec 2 with 1382 viewskarl

Taking my boy to his first game on Saturday on 01:22 - Dec 2 by FredManRave

This thread just keeps getting more emotional!

A great read all round, especially the pre and post match posts from DaneHoop. So pleased you both had a great day. And welcome to GRDHoops.

Nothing but admiration and best wishes from me to Dane and GRD.
[Post edited 2 Dec 2014 1:22]


Absolutely Fred, count myself lucky that our two kids don't have to face the difficulties some others have but i'm sure Dane (and the other parents) has found great joy in over coming the hurdle of this first game and finding out it was in fact an enjoyable experience for the kids. Well done to the club and probably surrounding fans in helping make it so.

One little story about taking my daughter to games. She first went aged 5 in 2011 and watched a succession of 4 wins so when Hibs got to the Scottish Cup final in 2012 against Hearts i had to get my lucky mascot a ticket!
Tried and tried but very hard for non season ticket holders and no one was wanting to miss this chance of beating Hearts and first Scottish cup win for 100 years exactly so spares were non existent, finally a couple of hundred tickets were released to each club following debenture returns and on the phone next morning managed to get two! Yay everything great until of course we got hammered 5-1 by the worst team it could happen against but as we were leaving the ground she said (as only a youngster could get away with) 'Don't worry Dad - at least we scored one goal' with a big smile and gave me a hug.
It didnt seem right but she did put it into perspective and we went back to the hotel, met her mum and younger brother and we had a nice evening almost as though it had just been a (bad) dream!
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